Fighting Heart: Fighting Heart Erotic Bad Boy Romance Series Book 1 Read online

  “I want you naked, Ashley.”

  “I want you naked too.”

  “I want you naked first,” he said. He was insistent and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand as if he was drooling. I smiled at him, and I knew I had to surrender. It felt sexy, and yet somehow dangerous. A heady mix. I unzipped my skirt, and pulled my tights down exposing the silk underwear I guess I had worn just for such an occasion. I slid my boots off.

  “And your top.”

  “Really?” I teased. He nodded. Brandon was on heat. I stripped my T shirt away, and cast it on the floor.

  “Lay on the sofa, baby. You look so good.”

  I walked over to the leather sofa and laid down gently, shivering as the cool surface touched my skin. Brandon walked across to me, stripping his shirt and T shirt. He tossed them to the floor. I gazed up at his muscular physique and drank it in. His hand came down and stroked the soft hills of my breasts, then his fingers teased in between the cup and my skin. He pulled my breasts free over the cups.

  He laid his hand on my hip, and surprised me as he jerked me over into a kneeling position.

  “Are you wet baby?”

  As he said it I only then noticed just how aroused I felt. “Yeah, I’m all wet for you.”

  “Good girl.”

  He grabbed at my panties and pulled them down over my ass. His hands seized my hips and turned me around, and his fingers slid over my skin, down over my ass, down all the way until I felt his fingers slide between my pussy lips. I winced. The touching ceased and I waited. In the next moment I felt the skin of his firm abdomen press against me. I bit my lip. His touch opened me up before the head of his manhood pressed into me. I bit my lip harder and hoped I was open enough for him. His hands seized my hips and now he pushed hard into me, thrusting deep, pushing me up against the back of the sofa. I groaned in shock and awe at the feeling of him opening me up and filling me so suddenly. There was heat and pleasure. There was also pain. The pain was killed as his shaft pulled back and slid out so gently, I sighed again. The second thrust came, hard and deep again. And the third, each time I gasped, because it felt like he might split me open. He drew back and now he started pushing faster and harder. The feeling of fullness, the shock of his pushing, it blocked out the whole world. I felt his body suddenly tense, and he seized me hard and pressed his whole body against me with severe force and shafted as deep into me as he could. His cock throbbed and his body became a solid weight as his seed burst into me. I just couldn’t help but cum in response, the sensations had been so extreme. I groaned and ground my body back against him and he laughed in triumph. This sex was oh so good. But now it was bad too. Brandon’s desire was just as intense as before, and yes, it felt wonderful to have him in me, but this time was different. There was less tenderness, less care. Something had changed, and I hoped it wasn’t nature of our relationship. But I guess I thought it was.

  Twelve

  I was walking down the main corridor, the central artery of the college building which passed the Great Hall where the degrees and honours would be given out at the end of the year. It was Tuesday, the day after Brandon had used his wealth to clear my debt, the day after he publically proclaimed me to be part of his cool arty entourage. It was also the day the dynamic of our relationship had dramatically shifted– even down to our most intimate moments. The sex was still great, don’t get me wrong, but from out of nowhere there were traces of ownership, authority and even violence in the way he treated me. These traces could have seemed sexy and maybe they were… but there was something else going on there too and it made me feel uncomfortable. I couldn’t process it yet. I certainly couldn’t talk about it to Cody either. Not about that part anyway. We walked side by side, Cody and I, talking and friendly, but not yet back to the level of trust he had given me before. I understood that. I had to go easy on him for a little while or else a potentially great friend would be entitled to shun me altogether. As we passed the Dean’s office and his door opened and a male student emerged with a glum look on his face. The Dean stood in the door behind him and I caught his eye. I really didn’t want a conversation with him right then, but he called me over.

  “Ashley! How are you feeling after yesterday’s turn of events? Relieved I assume?”

  I walked over with Cody, not wanting the Dean to discuss my affairs in front of the bustling corridor full of my fellow students.

  “Relieved is one word. At least I won’t get kicked out now,” I said.“Um, no. No, not on account of your finances. You have every chance of making the best of your time here now. Did you work out who your benefactor was?”

  “I think so,” I said.

  “There could only have been one or two people intimate enough with your affairs to want to part with such a huge sum…”

  I stared at the Dean. He was being deliberately vague, but the way he chose his words was loaded with innuendo. Intimate... Affairs... He was insinuating some guy had paid off my debt for sex. What a complete bastard! I just couldn’t believe what I was hearing.

  “I’m an honest person, Dean. Cody here knows all about my situation. I haven’t slept with him yet.”

  “That’s not at all what I meant, Ashley, just…” said the Dean.

  “Of course you didn’t, because comments like that coming from a senior academic here at Smiths would be highly inappropriate, maybe even career threatening, wouldn’t they?”

  “Of course, but that wasn’t what I said or meant. I simply meant to share congratulations, Ashley. That’s all.”

  “Then thank you. I’ve got to get ready for class. See you later Dean.”

  The Dean was flushed in the face and his eyes were wide and mortified. He closed the door as quickly as he could.

  “Wow. You had the balls to put someone like him back in his box. These people are like small gods in this place. I could never do what you’ve just done,” said Cody.

  “Yes you could, Cody. When someone’s an arsehole, it’s your moral duty to let them know.”

  “That’s great. What you just said, I have to use that in my book,” said Cody, grinning.

  “If you do, I want royalties.”

  “Do you really think the Dean was insinuating…”

  “Yes I do.”

  Cody was quiet for a beat. I knew he was thinking. He changed his tone of voice to sound upbeat but it came it false.

  “So, are you and Brandon… an item?” asked Cody hesitantly.

  “This is because of what the Dean said.”

  “Partly. But I do know Brandon is one of the super cool set and that he gets in the press a lot and that he has money behind him… and he’s had some early success in the literary field. I mean, I’ve read his stuff. I don’t really rate it if I’m honest. It’s all about shock without content. Maybe he read that Brett Easton Ellis guy and is trying to be a Brit version… it’s cheap. It’s not for me.”

  “Thanks for the review on Brandon. I haven’t read his stuff, Cody. Not yet. I’ve been so busy and we only just hooked up last week. He’s a good looking guy and he helped me get that job at Purdy’s…”

  “So you hooked up with him... What, as a thank you?”

  “Cody! You sound like the fucking Dean.”

  “Look, I’m sorry. It’s none of my business,” he said.

  “No…” I sighed. “Maybe not. But my head is in a mess right now and I really need to talk this through with somebody.” I looked at Cody, knowing this was awkward. I knew Cody wasn’t the right one to talk to, but I just didn’t need any more of this judgement. Penny wasn’t around and I needed to clear my head badly. “Let’s go and talk,” I said.

  “Sure,” said Cody, looking all down in the mouth.

  “But you’ve got to promise me one thing. You must not judge me and you have to stay impartial, okay? Please?”

  I saw Cody struggle with that a second. “Sure,” he said.

  Then we walked to the canteen, and my heart was racing, because I had a ton of seething confus
ion and concern rising up in me which I was finally about to let out.

  After I’d told him everything, Cody sat and looked at me and scratched his head. He looked half like a pissed off teenager having a sulk, and half like he wanted to hug me. I waited to see which side won the war.

  “You think it’s changed your relationship? The money I mean,” said Cody.

  “I know it has. From the get-go he started treating me differently, parading me around at the Union in front of his friends. They don’t even like me. I’ve got nothing in common with them. Then he told them about what he did in paying off the debt. That was so embarrassing.”

  “Embarrassing! That was crass. I wouldn’t ever have done that,” he said.

  “Yeah, so he made it look like he owns me. I hate that. I’ve always been independent. As in always,” I said.

  “I know. I can see that.”

  “Here’s the thing. I think it even changed how things were between us… intimately.” Now I blushed. I was in very strange territory.

  “You really don’t have to tell me that stuff, Ashley.”

  “I know. I know, I’m sorry…” Then I blurted it out. “But suddenly he’s controlling me in all these other little ways. I’m not sure I like it, Cody. I mean, I’m not even sure I want to think of this as a relationship right now. We’ve only been together twice… I just don’t know.”

  “I can’t advise you on the, uh, intimate part, Ash, but if you feel bad, you shouldn’t do anything you don’t want to. You’re not obliged, so just refuse, say no, and don’t go home with him. Whatever. It’s your choice. He doesn’t own you Ashley. He never will. You didn’t ask him to pay them off, did you?”

  I shook my head, relieved to hear his words reflecting my own thoughts. And at the same time I was getting angry with Brandon for taking me for granted.

  “I need to pay him off, Cody.”

  Cody nodded but said nothing. He was already lost in deep thought. Paying off Brandon was easier said than done. I still had to work every damn hour of the day and night to earn that money, and now in some respects it was even worse. I now had to get myself free from my debt to a man who seemed to be changing with each day. I wanted out as quickly as I could. Brandon was delicious, and tempting, but already I felt I needed to tear myself away from his gravitational pull.

  Thirteen

  Never leave the scene of a decision without taking action. It was a principle I’d learned from my ex-boyfriend Fletcher. In fact it was probably the only good thing I ever learned from Fletch. And now as I confessed my fears to Cody I realised that I needed to do something about Brandon. Even if it turned out that I was just being a total paranoid freak and his intentions were perfectly genuine, it would surely be better to speak with him now than to fret and fume about it alone. I decided I would track him down and talk it through. After class I went to the Union bar to see if he was there. I caught sight of Amanda again, hanging around with two of Brandon’s boy cronies near the pool table. I saw her look my way from underneath her shock fringe, but she didn’t bat an eyelid or say hello. By now I couldn’t have given two gift wrapped shits about Amanda’s opinion of me. Brandon wasn’t in sight, so I texted him. His reply came and it was unexpected:

  “Writing in a Greenwich Café. Miss you. Come and see me if you can.”

  That sounded very cool, but it didn’t let him off the hook. I texted him again to ask why.

  “Doing a reading tonight in Greenwich Pub Theatre. Come down.”

  Cody said Brandon was getting some traction with his writing and it sounded like he was right.

  Brandon showed me around the Greenwich pub theatre. The pub was open for the afternoon crowd, and there were some tourists thumbing the theatre leaflets and a few people eating pies with their drinks. It was a typical student environment. The place was full of dark wood, so dark it felt black, with some kind of deep veneer which looked like a gloss. Brandon was proud of the whole thing. The venue wasn’t much, but it was a venue all the same, and Brandon Lynes name was on the flyer. Brandon was due to make a reading from his new book, Down the Dreamline. Brandon had been given a room to prepare for the whole day, a place to unwind and use as a base.

  “The whole gig has been organised by my agent. It’s to keep the Bo-Ho crowd happy, really. My readership tend to come from the student fraternity or they’re educated female readers, so this venue offers something for both. Mike says the educated ladies like the fact I have looks and brains.”

  It sounded a little conceited to me, but I guess this was a business, and Brandon was the product. “You do have a certain look,” I said, not wanting to massage his ego too much. The idea of tonight’s gig, with my boyfriend as the star attraction – my writer boyfriend who had an agent – it all sounded so cool and glamorous, but if I was going to remain there, it would have to be after a tough discussion with him. On top of that I’d have to phone into Purdy’s and pull a sickie. At least it was only a Tuesday. They would hardly be snowed under at the diner tonight.

  “You have a certain look, too Ashley. Though my favourite version is when you’re naked.”

  That caught me off guard. My stomach did a little flip, and a felt a sudden little twinge of need for him. If I was going to speak with him at all needed to speak to him soon.

  “Brandon. We need to talk…”

  “Sure. In my room. Let me show you, this pub is so very old, it’s really cool.”

  He took my hand and led me up a rickety staircase. When we reached the second floor he took out a key and pushed into a beige and red room with a big dark wooden four poster bed in the middle of it. Straight away I could see where this was going, but I wasn’t intending to play. Not straight away. But that bed did look amazing and I had never done it with a beautiful man on a four poster bed before. Jeez, Brandon really knew how to mess with my head and he wasn’t even trying.

  He closed the door and leaned against it. “What do you think?”

  “It’s like you said, very cool.”

  “How does my muse feel about… amusing me?”

  I kept my serious vibe on my face, but already I was feeling like I could run up and kiss his face off.

  “Brandon. This is difficult for me… we need to talk.”

  “Then talk, baby.”

  Baby. That sounded good. I was melting, but I had to be strong. I forced the words to my lips before I could back out.

  “You paid my tuition fees, Brandon. That was cool and amazing. But you shouldn’t have done it. It was my debt and my responsibility.”

  Brandon laughed with big eyes and shrugged. “Honey, I wanted to help you.” He moved towards me and took my hand. Oh no.

  “I wanted you to be free of worry, and I wanted you to stay at university.”

  “But why Brandon?”

  “Isn’t it obvious?”

  “Maybe, a little. But I’m worried its changed things between us.”

  “Changed things? We haven’t been together long enough to know what change would feel like. But I like the way it’s going don’t you? We are a hot couple, wouldn’t you say?”

  Now he was close by and playing with my hair. His hands felt good in my hair.

  “Brandon… I want things to stay good between us, really good. So I’ve been thinking, we need to come to an arrangement. I want us to agree that I am going to pay you off over a set period. Maybe nine months, like with the college. What do you think?”

  Brandon shook his head. “What?! No way, Ashley! You’re not paying me back. Not in cash anyways.”

  His last comment was a joke. At least I hoped it was.

  “Brandon. I need to do pay you back. I’ve always been independent. I’ve always paid my way, it’s just one of my things…”

  “But that’s over now baby. We’re together. Why would you want to struggle alone when you can be free to do what you want with me?”

  That didn’t sound much like independence right there. It sounded a lot like control. No matter how awesomely good l
ooking Brandon was, no matter what he was doing to my libido right there and then, I couldn’t ever surrender altogether. It just wasn’t me.

  “No Brandon. That’s not going to work for me. Please, let’s make an agreement. Then we can move on and be together without that causing an issue for us.”

  His face changed and I felt his embrace grow a little firmer and colder.

  “Causing an issue for us? Ashley, did you come here to argue with me on a day I’ve got to do a reading? Is that what this is?”

  “No, Brandon. I came here to fix things with you.”

  “Fix things? That’s what I did for you, fix things! All you’ve got to do is say thank you and that’s it. We live happily ever after and have some great times together...”

  “I like the sound of great times… but I need to pay my way.”

  “Don’t do this! Don’t do this, Ashley.”

  “Do what?”

  “Spoil what we have. What I did for you was a gift for both of us, I admit it. I want to free you of your burdens so you can your time with me. I really don’t like the fact you’ve turned this into a point of argument, Ashley. It seems a little ungrateful to me, but I think I can forgive you for that…”

  He put his hand into my hair again, but he was firm with me now. My heart began to thud faster.

  “Ashley. Ashley. My naughty little girl. You came here to be naughty, and now I’m going to have to punish you…”

  “Brandon. I didn’t mean to offend but we need to come to an arrangement…”

  “No baby. Not now. But you were right about one thing, we do have to cum.”

  He wrapped his big arms all the way round me and squeezed me tight. I pushed away from him, my hands against his chest, first of all I pushed hard and I felt his chest quake with laughter. He wasn’t taking me seriously. I pushed again, but now he was stroking my back and nuzzling my shoulder. I was resenting him like hell, the way he was manipulating me and dominating me, but his kiss felt good too. “Brandon!” I said, but not too loudly.